May 3, 2020
/4 Easter
Acts 2:42-47; Psalm 23; 1 Peter 2: 19-25; John 10: 1-10
The Rev. Jimmy Grace
In the Name of God: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. AMEN.
Good morning, everyone. It is really good to be here with you all – virtually, from a distance, I know. But it is still good to be here with you. I want to begin this morning to simply address a question many of you all probably have which is when are we going to resume in person worship. I have two answers to that question – the short and the longer answer. Short answer: I’m not sure. Here’s the longer answer: The Bishop and his staff are listening to medical experts and heading their advice and I have convened several members of the Vestry along with our staff here at St. Andrew’s to form a “Regathering Task Force” that will work with me to insure that when our doors do open, we are ready. So we are working on a plan in consultation with the Diocese and other Episcopal churches.
I am grateful today that we can worship together through this live stream, but I am also aware that it is not the same as being together. A priest and good friend of mine told me recently that one his parishioners told him that watching their service online was about as interesting as watching golf. I think watching worship online is more like watching CPSAN – where you watch people sit and talk or read, or stand and talk and read. It’s not riveting stuff (my apologies to any CSPAN fans out there). Even if we were to dress this up – have different camera angles, fancy lighting, words on the screen, etc. That’s all still window dressing in my opinion, and it doesn’t take away from the reality that this church on a Sunday morning only has 8 people physically in it.
After doing services this way for the last seven weeks I can tell you that I am grieving not seeing you. That might sound glib or cliché, but it’s the truth. I care for you ,and so when I look out this morning and see pews where you all typically are, and see them empty, week after week, is depressing to me. It just is. I feel that grief. What are you grieving now during this time? That’s not a rhetorical question. I actually want you to think about this strange moment all of us are in, and for many of us feel grief about a part of it. Where are you seeing that grief right now? Answer the question – write your answer on the live stream comments - be as long winded or brief as you want to be, but be honest.
I am sure you all are grieving all kinds of things right now. Let this be a moment to be honest about that.
Two weeks ago I received a phone call from a parishioner, Gary Moseley, who told me that his mother, at 96 years of age, was nearing her final moments. I went to visit her in an assisted living home, and after filling out a questionnaire and having my temperature taken, I was permitted to visit her. When I entered the room, I saw something beautiful. I saw a frail elderly woman of advanced age, resting quietly and peacefully in her bed, and nestled between her head and the crook of her left arm, was a baby doll.
That doll, had brought her comfort during this last chapter of her life, and when I saw this 96 year-old woman holding that doll in bed, it was like watching the full circle of life – a woman so old was herself becoming a little girl again. I knelt beside her bed, and began to recite the 23rd psalm – the psalm that was sung so beautifully by members of our choir moments ago. I said prayers, and then anointed her with oil, and then quietly left. Mrs. Moseley went to be with God later that evening. As soon as we are permitted to worship in person together again, we will have a memorial service here to honor her life.
I have found the 23rd psalm to be one of the greatest and most powerful responses to human grief. I have said it in multiple hospital rooms, funerals, homes, the list goes on and on. The psalm reminds us that even though we are walking through the valley of the shadow of death we shall fear no evil. This is a psalm that is large enough to bear our grief.
I heard the other day the former boxer Mike Tyson say something that struck me as profound as I think about grief this morning. He said, “I used to think life was about getting everything, but now I realize that life is about losing everything.” That’s really what life is – life is a process of losing things – losing friendships, losing parents, and in the end, losing our very bodies. That’s not a very popular message – but it’s the truth. In the stark reality of loss and grief, the 23rd psalm meets us and says – “yes, it is true, you really will lose everything, even your life but remember though you walk through the valley of the shadow of death you will fear no evil.
So I want to pivot away from grief now, recognizing its importance as an emotional response to the reality of loss every single one of us deals with. Because while the 23rd psalm is powerful during times of grief, it is equally so during times of thanksgiving and joy. As the author of the psalm writes “surely your goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.” This psalm is large enough to contain our grief as well as our joy. So that’s where I want to go right now – I want to ask you another question, and I want you to write out your answers on the comments. This is the question – where have you found joy in the last seven weeks? It could be anything. Here is my answer. It was seeing John Ibanez last week in the men’s bible study. Although he was in the hospital for a medical procedure, John was able to be with our group in his hospital bed on Zoom at 6 in the morning. It was singing songs with Paul Hardwick and Ed Amash atop Harold’s restaurant last Tuesday evening.
I want to close with an invitation. I want to invite you to read the 23rd psalm daily, for one week, starting today. And I want to invite you to listen as you read it and pray it for how God speaks to you through it. And finally, I invite you this week to look into your grief, and consider how God is present int the things you have lost or are losing just as God is also present in the things that bring you joy right now. AMEN.